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Some
Essential Dating Advice For
Men
By
Mike Pilinski
If you're a single guy still
looking for your dream woman, I'm sure you've
absorbed lots of advice on how
best to meet and date women by now. A
lot of it is "common sense" as
you well know. Therefore,
assuming you know enough not
to show up on a first date looking
like you just combed your hair
with an M-80 or wearing cowboy
boots and shorts, maybe a few
of the following ideas can give you
just enough of an edge to make
the difference between Date #2
with an exciting little fox --
and a date with ol' Rosie Palm
instead. Check these out :
1 ) Don't Try To Act Like A
Fake On The First Date
A woman often makes a far more
profound emotional investment into a relationship than a man
does. So for her, TRUST is an immensely important issue.
Dating is not just a
convenient way to get her rocks off, it's a
case study in the male psyche.
Can she trust you to ever be a
good future father? Don't
laugh, unless she's middle-aged and
well beyond the kids &
husband
phase of her life, this
"mating calculus" is
ALWAYS running somewhere in the back of her
mind.
Acting like a phoney with an
obviously fake 'come-on' personality only demonstrates
how easily you are willing to embrace deception in order to
get something you want. To any
woman other than the sad
exception of the chick who's
looking for another loser for her
next
AA reclamation project (maybe
10% to 15% of the female
population), you are TOTAL
POISON. A potential cheater and
heartbreaker just waiting for
his next victim to arrive. She
may dump
you right away, OR depending
on
the depth of her general
bitterness towards men, keep
you around to engage in a little
recreational tease and
torturing if she's got a vendetta to settle with
a guy like you. Beware!
2 ) Create New Memories
Instead Of Swapping Them
Here's the very best dating
advice I can ever give anyone:
in order to make any date memorable and fun, spend 90%
of your activities in the present
moment.
It's easy to get caught up in
the "talking trap"
on a date -- where the two of you sit
around and get lost in deeper
and deeper conversation. These
'chatting dates' can slip out
of control and become subtle
passion-killers though,
especially if you're not careful to keep the
big picture in focus. Before
you know it, you're spilling your
guts about Father Hamhands
from
your altar boy days or waxing
poetic about your hemorrhoids
and how they love to swell up in
the springtime. Yeesh. As Joey
from the TV show Friends once
scolded his buddy Chandler,
"... ok, that's TOO MUCH
information!..."
For a seduction to go off like
a thing of beauty, you must reveal yourself SLOWLY --
bit-by-bit -- as you gradually
come to know her. Think of dating as
an emotional veil dance... a striptease -- the point of
which is to make her
anticipate when the next Veil of Male Mystery
will come off! This is the
kind of thing she's been DREAMING
about all her life. Why?
Because it
makes everything that's to
follow (including the sex) all
that much more delicious for her.
So put ACTION ahead of endless
yakking. Stay active on a date
(it doesn't have to be an extreme sport-fest or
anything, just visiting a flea market will
do...) so that you are
BUILDING a memory with her instead of
SHARING one. Focus on having experiences with her that the
two of you can reminisce about
some day in the future --
instead of spending time
caught up in
a lot of drawn-out amateur
psychotherapy sessions in a
bar somewhere. Conversation is
very important in any new relationship, and is the
pathway to her eventual sexual
surrender, but you must
provide her with a REASON to want to
know so much about you *FIRST*
before opening your soul.
Never forget the importance of your
veil dance.
3 ) Don't Be A Bore
A boring person is
anti-charismatic -- which is
to say that, instead of making people feel
GOOD about themselves by
acting interested in them, the boring
person makes us want to run
away<
screaming from the agony of
having to listen to another
second of his self-absorbed droning!
The point of conversation
should always be focused on
drawing HER interests out instead of
dwelling on your own (but
don't come across like a ruthless
Nazi interrogator -- go easy
on the unbroken string of questions).
Share a little -- but keep
YOUR interests lost in the background. Her response to a
few casual queries about her life or
current dreams holds clues to
your *LifeLine*. Cling to it
tightly and work on expanding
its scope. Submerge your own ego for the
first few dates. Don't worry,
when you finally hook her she'll
begin questioning you
intently...maybe TOO intently! But that
probably won't happen until
after you've had sex. (Then get
ready for the onslaught!)
4 ) Forget About Trying To Act
"Like Yourself"
The standard dating advice of
"being yourself" or
"acting like yourself" (whatever the
hell that means) is pure
"Oprah-istic" B.S.
Learn to strike a balance
between coming on like a
phoney- baloney (which we talked about
earlier), and seeming too safe
and friendly. Seduction is a
delicate bubble that can be
burst
with increasingly less effort
as it ripens. A first date is
NOT the place to remain in the
role of your everyday average
old sort of guy... that's spells
B-O-R-I-N-G. A spark must be present to ignite the *fires
of desire* in the old primal portion of her brain.
So that means you have to be
EXCITED to be out with her!
When you think about it, it should
be easy to get juiced up...
dating someone for the very first
time is not something that happens
every day in anyone's life.
Face it, ordinary life sucks. Romance is a fantasy
voyage,
an escape from the 9 to 5
daily drudgery of work, etc. Treat
this rare event for what it
is...something unique, unrepeatable
and potentially unforgettable.
Even if she seems too cool to
care, trust me... her romance motor is humming along in high
gear.
5 ) Five Minutes Of Nerves Is
Normal, Then Calm Down
After some initial awkwardness
due to understandable jitters,
you should be able to calm
down and hit your stride. If
you have a real problem controlling
automatic body reactions to nervousness (bad sweating,
stuttering, facial twitching,
etc.) my best advice is to get a
book on yoga and practice it WITH AN
OPEN MIND. You don't have to
go nuts and join the Green
Party or anything, but DO try some of
the deep breathing and
relaxation techniques. They really work
and can give you the
self-control edge you might need. This will
project through in your
attitude as a cool confidence that is
the unmistakable sign of a High
Status Male!
Learn to always keep your
movements around the women
you're trying to seduce graceful and
deliberate like a snake
charmer. Modulate your voice in a
throaty style (lowered volume)
and keep the tone of your words
sounding a little bit
"conspiratorial" (without going overboard and
making a fool of yourself). A squeaky voice
spells fear and
sounds adolescent, so strive
to keep it in check. Be
self-aware.
6 ) Obsession Is The Hallmark
Of The Weak Male
Dominant males will show an
interest in any attractive
woman they encounter because they
are highly sexually driven.
But --because they have many options
with females open to them --
they do NOT act obsessive about any
*particular* woman. So don't
be obsessed with her... just be
interested. Proclaiming ridiculously inappropriate
nonsense like "...I love
you" or "You're the girl I've
been searching for my whole
life..." on a first or second date is the
frightening talk of the
potential stalker. You become
RADIOACTIVE to women once word
of your engaging in this kind of
bizarre behavior spreads. And
it will spread... women gossip like
demons. So chill the
subservient groveling and act like you've
been down the dating &
mating road a few times already.
7 ) No Matter What Happens,
Assume She Likes You... and
Believe It
I'm not kidding here... this
is an essential Jedi mind
trick that you MUST somehow learn to
play on yourself. Simply
ASSUME that any woman you're working
will *always* like you -- and
do whatever the hell it takes to
sell this idea to your
unconscious mind! Women can become
mesmerized by men who seem to
be captivated by them. But this
kind of 'vibe' can only shine through your body language if
it's GENUINE -- and for that
to happen, you have to believe
that she will respond
favorably to you... *no matter what*.
Remember... ATTITUDE +
UNCONSCIOUS BELIEFS = THE
TRUTH. Your attitude is a naked expression
of your unconscious beliefs
about yourself. Therefore, it is
interpreted BY OTHERS as
revealing the absolute truth about
you... whether YOU like it or
not. Control the self-image that
you project to the world by pushing
the crappy beliefs about
yourself out of your brain,
and replace them with empowering
ones that
will advance your own personal
'cause' for a change. Strive
to deliberately manipulate
this critical part of your consciousness, and watch your
world change before your eyes like magic.
Before long, you'll soon have
your pick of all the best
looking women in YOUR world!
About the author:
Mike Pilinski is the author of
"Without Embarrassment", a new
e-book designed to show men
how to develop unique
psychological defenses to protect themselves
from ever having to fear being
rejected again. Visit http://www.highstatusmale.com
and pick up a FREE copy of the 25 page
Mini-Course "The Three
Keys to Seducing Any Woman"
**Official Author's Website**
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